7 fundamental rules for visiting a newborn
A Facebook post from 2024 that teaches what to do when meeting a newborn for the first time has gone viral again.
The birth of a baby is very special, so it's normal that our loved ones want to participate as much as possible and meet the new member as soon as possible. But when the delivery finally arrives, many visitors end up forgetting that this moment of immense joy is also full of difficulties for the new parents who need a lot of support and collaboration from visitors.
Through a post in good humour to help well-meaning visitors, grandmother, mother and certified doula Tina Madelina brings 7 essential rules according to the baby's perspective, which must be followed when visiting a newborn.
1. Don't kiss me
Don't kiss me anywhere, at any time, no matter how irresistible I seem. In fact, don't put your face near mine or my hands and wash them before touching me anywhere.
2. Don't take me out of where I am
If my parents hand me over to you in a stroller or the baby car seat, use it. Don't take me out of where I am under any circumstances. My friends and I tend to be sensitive to your clothes, detergents, perfumes, colognes, so just keep me where I am and I'll have fun.
3. Don't bring other children to visit me
I'm sure your children in particular are the healthiest children in the world, but let me put it this way: it's not you, it's me. I was born a germaphobe and it takes me a few months to adjust to this world full of "nasties". And don't ask my parents if you can bring your children anyway, they really don't like saying no.
4. If I start crying, don't try to calm me down
If I start crying when I'm with you, please, give me back to mommy. I know you want to calm me down and be a super-hero by doing that, but I really just want my mommy and daddy.
5. Be quick on my visit
I get hungry, sleepy, fussy, and I poop all the time. If you want to visit me, plan to come for less than an hour so that mommy and daddy can get back to giving me their undivided attention instead of receiving you! Also, don't plan to eat here (my mom barely eats, she doesn't have time to feed you) or stay longer unless you want to hear my shrill singing for the best opera in town - my practice time is always in the middle of the night!
6. If you want to hold onto me, don't be surprised by what I can do
I drool quite a bit, so relax. Listen, you wanted to hug me, make me burp, swaddle me, calm me down (see above), so now deal with it. Like I said, this is what I do all the time!
7. Don't expect too much from my parents
Please don't expect my mom to call you, text you, or post a million pictures of me on Facebook. She's busy taking care of me and would rather look at my sweet face than her phone.
Repercussion
The post has now been shared over 130,000 times and had over 87 thousand reactions. Madelina's post is an adaptation of a post by Huffpost mother and columnist, Dipti Vaid Dedhia.
In the comments there are parents who agree and others who disagree, but Madelina highlighted in her post that the post does not represent a parental judgement of other parents' parenting style, it is meant to encourage discussion and provide support.
And you, mothers and fathers? Do you agree with the 7 fundamental rules?